One of the things that makes a man is his willingness and conviction in acting deliberately. Very few decisions should be made on a whim or while beholden to mere emotion. That doesn’t mean a man doesn’t enter action with boldness, quite the contrary. What it does mean is that he should do as much planning and pondering as he can before the call to action so he can make the best decision and do so without hesitation.
So how does a philosophy like this apply to something as trivial as buying and wearing clothes? Well, as we’ve tried to outline over the last year, there are a lot of factors involved in choosing the best style – your build, your budget, your audience, your intended result, and others. There is not and never will be one piece of clothing that can be used by all men, to accomplish all goals, in all situations.
This means there needs to be some serious thought and planning that goes into choosing which tools you want in your proverbial belt. And, like may other aspects of a man’s life, this means taking some time to test the waters before fully committing along with being willing to change course if your current actions aren’t getting the desired results.
I’ll give you an example.
Part of my site is running a consultation side hustle. I help men learn about the unique aspects of their build, coloring, and contrast and how to use clothing to best accommodate those features. I also will help men find said clothing if they want the help. I have one client who sought me out more than a year ago. He had a whopping budget of more than $10k and wanted to start his wardrobe over from scratch. From my perspective this was the ideal position to be in. If someone gave me $10k and said I was only allowed to use it towards my style, it would be gone in about a week. However, this client has been working with me this entire year and we’re still not finished.
Some may say that this is ridiculous. Clothing is clothing and it shouldn’t take such a long period of time to build up a well-functioning wardrobe. For many men this may be true, but for my client – who is approaching this very deliberately – it’s crucial that he goes slowly. He has taken the time to test out every recommended retailer, style, pattern, color, and other variable before fully committing to them. Once he’s comfortable, he makes large orders and doesn’t look back. But we take our time in finding out what will be his best option and trying it out.
Not only does this ensure he gets the most bang for his buck, it also helps his whole wardrobe look and feel more comfortable. One of the hardest things about improving a man’s style is that it can feel like a costume at first. However, by improving by one or two steps at a time, it gives that same man the opportunity to acclimate to his clothes and for his clothes to break in and adapt to him. That leather jacket, pair of shoes, or blazer that felt silly six months ago is now starting to feel like a second skin. He wears his clothes rather than being worn by them.
So walk before you run, eat the milk before the meat, and make sure you’re happy with the trial run before committing to a full relationship with a retailer, style, or tailor. You wouldn’t commit to one girl after just meeting her, so why would you do the same with your clothing? This doesn’t mean you need to go slower than you’re comfortable simply because you want to be overly cautious, but it does mean you shouldn’t feel discouraged if street photographers aren’t following you like paparazzi after only a month of trying to dress better. It’ll come with deliberate effort and time.