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PUA Theory Vs Reality Marrying Women Over 30

At the old age of 34 I’ve come to the realization there are a lot of PUA and Red Pill advice that’s out there that sound great in principle or theory but once applied to day to day reality don’t make any sense. What’s even worse is that there are a lot of younger guys in college hell even high school that read a lot of PUA blogs and if they go down the wrong path might spend years of development focused on the PUA theory that doesn’t apply to real life. For that matter there are also a lot of regular/ older guys that are just now finding the red pill and a lot of mansophere blogs who may also waste time trying to apply incorrect theory.

One of those theories is the concept of never marrying a woman over 30. The theory goes that an over 30 year old woman has lower fertility, been on the cock carousal longer, and most importantly will hit the wall faster than a woman in her 20’s. So if you’re going to marry a woman find a 21 year old virgin (or girl with a low notch count) and marry her. There isn’t really much to argue with over that its great… as a theory. But the problem with the theory is it’s focusing strictly on numbers and a fear of hitting the wall.

Now let’s make some logical assumptions. A majority of you guys live in the United States and probably a decent size to big city. You’re educated and if you’re considering getting married you’re either at the end of your 20’s or into you early to mid-30’s even older. Lastly if you’re ready to get married and are a sane person you’ll want to date the girl minimum two to three years. An engagement period is another year. After the wedding most people would like to spend at least a year of enjoying being married before having kids. So by the time you meet a girl to the time you have kids that’s a minimum of four years on the fast track. That’s three to four years if everything goes right, you don’t get cold feet, she doesn’t get cold feet and you’re all in.

Applying these assumption to this theory certain things become clear. The best chance of accomplishing this theory is if you yourself are in your 20’s and have been dating the same girl since college. Otherwise you’re talking about being 30+ or older looking for and dating girls in their 20’s but out of college (21+ to drink). Not a big deal at first but in America girls in their early 20’s and out of college are focused on their carriers and making a name for themselves. Of course there are tons of girls who want to marry a guy that’s well off and older so they don’t have to work, hence if that’s you and you’re over 30 looking for the gold digger sure go for it (I have a post about this coming). Otherwise the way this theory works is that you’d have to be a 30 something year old man trolling college bars or trying to get into an early 20 something social circle all in the hopes of marrying a woman younger than 30 in America. If she’s a typical American she’ll want to work, start a relationship and you’re still looking at close to 4 years before you’re married with a kid. So if you’re 30 and she 24 (realistic age) you might not be married with a kid till she’s 28 and that’s with everything going great.

 

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More than the logistics of finding, dating and marrying a young 20 something is an even bigger problem is… full adult hood. Most girls right out of college don’t have fully developed life experiences. Guy or girl a person at 21 will not be the same person at 28, 30 or even 32. Think about your own life and how much your tastes, wants and needs have changed within five years. Even how if you just got into game and as your notch count increased your tastes and hunger developed and changed. What I’ve seen happen in my social circle is high school and college sweet hearts divorce within 8 to 10 years and the most common excuse is that they married when they were kids or too young to realize what they really wanted out of life. The theory that if you marry her young and inexperienced and fuck her till she falls in love with you you’ll have her forever or be able to enjoy her young body longer is unrealistic.

The biggest fear that comes out of the marrying women under 30 theory is that they will hit the wall faster after they turn 30. If you’re looking at an age (30) as the biggest factor in a woman hitting the wall then you’re looking at aging and women completely wrong. A woman in her 20’s who doesn’t exercise and based on her genetic background may hit the wall faster after her first kid in her 20’s than a woman who stays in shape and active that hasn’t had a kid. As you can see the concept of the wall is based on number is completely meaningless.

Instead of focusing on a number a man should be focusing on a woman’s lifestyle choices. Marry a woman who lives a lifestyle that will make her more sexually desirable to you in the long run. Sure a 21 year old has a great body but if she’s not working out and staying in shape then the rate of her metabolism slowing down will increase with each passing year. Put that together with her partying every weeknight, drinking, eating crappy food then you can see how focusing on a number again is meaningless. It’s one thing to meet an attractive girl but if you’re considering marrying her then you want her to stay looking good for as long as possible. So excessive smoking or drinking is out. Shitty diet is out. Massive weight gains and losses are out. Some sort of physical activity on a regular basis should be a must. She must be into staying in shape and looking good for herself though not doing it because of you or whoever she dates, that’s the real trick.

This is one of the best ways I know of guarding against a woman hitting the wall on you right after you marry her. With obesity on the rise in America marrying a woman under 20 in the belief you’ll enjoy her youthful body longer is a suckers bet. Marrying a woman regardless of her age who’s proven that she has the desire and self-control to stay in fit and look good makes more sense.

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About The Author

Been in the game since 2005 and still learning everyday. But now I feel comfortable giving back and sharing wisdom with guys looking to improve one or two things in their lives that could increase their self confidence and the chance of having a favorable outcome in any romantic interaction with women. When you step to her you know you've already put in that work on your end. Nothing is left to chance.

14 Comments

  1. Pete November 6, 2014 at 5:10 pm

    Haha my biggest fear is marrying a girl I later find out to be a massive slut. Consequence of the red pill has ingrained the belief that I don’t want any “carousel” scraps.

    Her being a similar age to me isn’t a big deal. All women age eventually. Some better than others. Find a girl who takes care of herself.

    • Virgle Kent November 7, 2014 at 11:25 am

      Pete
      Carousel scraps lol. It’s tough you can maybe guess or get a good picture but even with your so called “good girls” you’ll never REALLY KNOW. unless you took her virginity. You have no clue how many so called innocent girls I’ve hooked up with. Married conservative christian women, Fox news anchors or guests. I guess at my age I just accept that all women have a past and are a little grimy. Fuck I know I’ve straight dirt mcgirted with the best of them.

  2. Revo Luzione November 6, 2014 at 7:56 pm

    VK,

    Great post. I’ve been working out some of these ideas on my own.

    Prior to taking the red pill about 4 years ago, I had thought that it was better to date women 27is or a bit older, because you can tell by that time what their lifestyle is doing to their body.

    Girls at 22, 23 can get away with binge drinking and eating cupcakes daily, until they can’t. Generally, that youthful resiliency wears off by mid to late 20s, maybe a bit later. IF she’s still got an ass than you can bounce quarters off of, and got clear, smooth skin as she approaches 30, you should probably be OK.

    Of course it goes without saying, that we need to screen extensively for slut tells, BPD tendencies, femininity, desire to have a family (assuming you want all that).

    The other issue with the young ‘uns, as you stated, comes in when making that cultural bridge. Younger women are often not settled in themselves, they don’t have their likes & dislikes settled out yet. They don’t “know” themselves. Cliche, but there’s something to it.

    I’m 40, and I do want to have an LTR with a good woman, have kids, etc. I think that 7-14 years younger than me is optimal at this point in my life. At 27, I feel like a girl basically has her shit figured out, has a basic idea of what she wants, knows more or less who she is, and is hopefully responsible enough to have a mature relationship.

    My experience with 22-25 year olds shows that reponsibility piece is often lacking. Great as a side piece or a plate, but not as LTR material.

    There’s more to say here, but I’ll leave it at that for now. Glad to see you still blogging.

    • Virgle Kent November 7, 2014 at 11:18 am

      Revo,

      Exactly 27/28 or even 30 year old you is a good better bet on if she’s about a certain lifestyle that you like AND WILL LIVE THAT WAY. Picking a girl just on youth alone in the hopes you’ll enjoy her body for a longer period of time makes no sense. As a commenter on twitter said, some girls have hit the wall in their twenties within a year.

  3. Zelcorpion November 7, 2014 at 2:09 am

    Having a stable LTR/ or marrying if you absolutely have to for some reason – takes way more due diligence than checking out her lifestyle habits. In my opinion she has to be Red Pill or accepting of that, has to share my view on nutrition, medical treatments, has to submissive with me, be generally very loving around family, kids, animals and she must have a great desire to be together with a man for years without wanting to go out 3 times a week and checking on her Tinder profile 40x/day.

    Yes – those women are out there, but the likelihood that you will find one in the US is limited, albeit not impossible. Mail order bride marriages have a divorce rate of 15-20%, which belies the media propaganda out there who tells you some few horror stories while keeping silent about the 90% divorce rate of “mature” women marrying some foreign lover-boy.

    In any case – most guys should check way more than fitness habits before marriage – first of all their sanity.

    • Virgle Kent November 7, 2014 at 11:15 am

      Zelcorpion,

      I have no argument with your comment but I’d like to point out that all the things you listed are lifestyle habits that will keep a woman sexually appealing and attractive to “YOU”. My main point in this article is that if you’re worried about a woman hitting the wall then get with one that lives a healthy lifestyle that will prevent that. Not just with a sloppy 24 year old because she looks nice at that moment. I for one like crazy chicks but that’s just me

  4. zodak November 7, 2014 at 9:23 am

    i can’t believe you are advising men to settle for old sluts in their 30s?? you telling men to “man up” & take some carousel rider who can’t pair bond.

    men in their 30s should find a girl in their 20s to marry & any girl who is into her career is not wife material. if you want to be some beta bux sure marry some 30 year old alpha widow.

    oh & their fertility drops in their 30s, that’s a scientific fact

    • Virgle Kent November 7, 2014 at 11:11 am

      What are you talking about. I am not advising men to settle for old sluts. I’m telling guys if they’re truly worried about the future wife hitting the wall then they need to marry a woman who’s into taking good care of herself and in shape. And these days girls are sleeping with hundreds of dudes from 17 to 20 so in their twenties they can be sluts too. Also fertility dropping isn’t the same as becoming infertile. Did you know that men’s testosterone begin to drop in their 30s as well? Grow up.

      P.S my comment section is for you to pimp your own blog.

      • zodak November 20, 2014 at 4:16 pm

        i linked to my blog cause it had links to back up my claims. but if you are going to edit comments, you should fix yours.

  5. Cypher Raige December 14, 2014 at 8:24 pm

    Virgle, have ever read something, and as you read it you started to feel a loosening, a release of a subconsciously held tension? That’s the kind of relief I felt when I read your very lucid, well-thought-out article. Thanks for making me feel like I’m not betraying red pill philosophy if a take a careful, educated look at an older girl. Of course youth is the ideal, but the caveats you list are well worth thinking long and hard about.

  6. RevLifestyleDesign December 18, 2014 at 3:03 pm

    Great post,

    I like these myth destroying pieces you’ve been writing, its important not to let this stuff become dogmatic.

  7. Trinket April 5, 2015 at 10:55 am

    Thank goodness someone sane put their finger on it- HOW is a man ready to settle down going to meet, get to know, get engaged to and finally marry a woman in her early 20’s? How are girls in their early 20’s supposed to meet men who are a little older, significantly more career-oriented and activate in different social circles? Do you know how expensive drinks/dining can be on a student’s budget?
    How many girls in their 20’s are ‘sluts’ and how many are ‘innocents’? You must be joking.
    The best indicators for assessing a woman’s wife material, apart from whatever physical attractiveness standards float your boat (fit, vegetarian, etc) are 1) family and background, 2) education (not necessarily academic), 3) any future plans/how she sees herself in 10 years.
    If she’s a ‘warm hearted’ 22 year old who simply adores you, has a rocking body and could suck the nails off a board but her ex was a convict, likes tattoos and can drink you under the table…or has had abortions, ‘made mistakes’ and all that…better settle with a 30 year-old who only worked and studied and barely had time for the carousel. Corporate chicks are not as bad as you think they are.
    Cheers.

    • Brian January 12, 2016 at 8:11 am

      Yeah, my wife was 31 when we met, but she still had the face and body of a 20 year old and was a virgin. She had only even kissed two other guys, and that was as far as it went with anyone before me. She was all about doing well in school and waiting for the right guy. I know girls like that are rare, but they exist.

  8. coolio June 5, 2015 at 6:56 am

    There is an old sayng which is still valid: Before you marry a girl, take a good look at her mother. That’s how your future wife will your look after 2-3 decades.

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