34 Game, Love, and Fear

Today I turn thirty four and as I often do I take it as a moment to reflect on what it all means. To survey my life and environment and reevaluate the direction it’s heading. Game, PUA, Red Pill, MRA, Manosphere. God I’ve been in this shit for way too long. In a way I’ve watched it grow over ten years. From Tucker Max stories of crazy nights of getting drunk and laid to money making scheme of teaching other guys how to get laid to a complete lifestyle movement along with a way of fighting the extremes of Feminism.


What I see around me in the Manosphere is how game has morphed into fear. Western women are evil and just want to get you married, take your children, divorce you and leave you broke and beaten… all of them. Any woman who’s a lawyer or has a career is untrustworthy. Women who are educated and have successful careers are a bad investment. A new scientific report has come out showing that if a woman’s index finger is longer than her pointer finger she has more masculine traits and therefore more likely to cheat, so now go around measuring a woman’s finger. Marriage is a suckers bet not worth it. Long term relationships aren’t worth it. Investing your time or resources in any woman for any amount of time is not worth it.

Game has turned a young man’s lifestyle into a permanent state of being. It focuses on gaining a life full of lovers and bangs with multiple women instead of wasting time on any one girl developing anything deeper. It uses the theory that because most women by nature will eventually hurt you, screw you over, take something from you that the smart bet is to get your bangs in and keep it moving to the next fresh girl. Game after your twenties becomes a way of risk avoidance. It’s a simple way for guy to never enter into a relationship with a woman that may hurt them in some way. Or if you do enter a mini relationship to do so in such a way that you’ll always have the upper hand. A big point/ fear game uses is that there is always something better you can be getting so why settle for one. It tries to sell you this dream that on your death bed, in your final hours, you’ll think of all the hot young ass you pulled for many years and go into eternity with a smile on your face because you were too alpha to settle for anything less. It’s basically a way to brag in life over a meaningless victory.

Ask any guy who’s fucked a lot of women I mean A LOT. 150, 250, over 300. Ask them how many they really remember. Fuck I have a very impressive notch count and I don’t remember 95% of them. The minutes after I come things fade, a few months later the faces become a blur, finally a year later I can’t remember their names or the fact that we even fucked. That’s what’s waiting for you on your death bed.

Yes, with game you are smart enough to avoid the pain that comes with a relationship, you can always upgrade to a new model whenever you want. But taken to the extreme it’s like playing a video game, passing the first level, then pressing restart and playing the first level again. The first level is easy because you know where all the secret passage ways are, were all the weapons are hidden, when all the bad guys are coming. But everyone has told you the next level gets harder and more complex, that levels after that take longer and more investments to complete. That the odds of you even still liking the game and wanting to play become so miniscule that going past level one isn’t worth your time.

A brief summary of the levels

Level one

  • See girl, talk to girl, get phone number
  • Get girl out on 1 to 3 dates sleep with girl
  • Sleep with girl for as long as possible before she wants a relationship/serious commitment

Level two

  • Date girl in mini relationship to long term relationship (months to years)
  • Move in live together till next level or breakup

Level three

  • Get married, house, kids, old age death
  • Divorce.


All of these levels need game. The more levels you get into the more serious game you’ll need. There are guys I know who are stuck and struggling on level one having trouble getting a girls to show up to fucking dates. A lot of guys writing about game that are good at it and myself can get through level one in one fucking night, in the matter of a few hours. But could you imagine living your whole life on level one? Do you see how easily Heaven can turn into Purgatory? How a gift becomes a curse? And for what? Because you’ve heard from others that level two and level three aren’t worth it? Or they are only worth it with a specific type of girl that existed long ago in the 1930’s that our great grandfathers were surrounded by.

Here’s the hard truth most game gurus don’t tell you. The relationship between couples has not changes by much since the dawn of time. Men have cheated, women have cheated, and couples have argued and fought and wanted to kill each other. There are ups and there are downs. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. It’s one big fucking fight. It just depends what kind of fighter you are. Are you the type who sees his opponent in the ring and decides to never set up the fight because he’s too big or too good or the odds of winning aren’t in your favor or with the help of game do you start training and fighting lessor opponents until you’ve worked your way up to the level where you’re ready to fight. To give it your all and know that in the end there is still a chance of losing. Game is not a guarantee of never getting hurt. To avoid any and all pain is to avoid really living ALL possibilities of your life. Obviously there will always be something better/ younger out there… ALWAYS!

In your twenties use game to experience them all, get your notches, explore everything sexually your heart desires. But never become afraid of a relationship with a woman who you are attracted to that turns you on and satisfies you in the way that you want. Date her! If you are dating her and you could see her living with you then live with her! If you’ve been living with her and could see being with her for the rest of your life and her having your kids then fucking marry her (or have kids)! You will come to this point when you know deep down that another notch won’t make your life better. When the return of getting dressed, going out, and spitting game for sex starts to give you diminishing returns on the pleasure of that actual sex. If you decide to go to the next levels,   you two may grow up together and in the same direction or grow apart and become different people but you fucking stepped in the ring and you fought for something. You lived your life without fear and without rushing into anything. Do not fear fully loving someone because to love someone is to accept that that person will eventually hurt you. They’ll let you down, steal from you, disappoint you, lie to you and even if they manage to not do any of this and it all works out… they die on you. All of these things are out of your control but the risks of the lowest points are just what comes with the highest feeling of Love. The best thing about game is once you’ve learned it, it’s always there, and it gives you confidence. The true confidence comes from knowing that if it doesn’t work out, you’ll be hurt, pick yourself up and will be able to go out say hello to a pretty girl and start the game all over again. That’s what the real fighters’ do that’s what survivors do. That’s what people who truly live life do.


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About The Author

Been in the game since 2005 and still learning everyday. But now I feel comfortable giving back and sharing wisdom with guys looking to improve one or two things in their lives that could increase their self confidence and the chance of having a favorable outcome in any romantic interaction with women. When you step to her you know you've already put in that work on your end. Nothing is left to chance.


  1. mr johnson October 7, 2014 at 11:12 am

    good post, and this is important : “The relationship between couples has not changed by much since the dawn of time. Men have cheated, women have cheated, and couples have argued and fought and wanted to kill each other. ” I see so much romanticizing the past in terms of the relationship dynamic between men and women. I watch my grandparents interact ( who had a VERY traditional marriage in terms of gender roles ) and honestly, its not the utopian vision we like to think it is. Tunnel vision can be a trap that leads us to delusion. Happy Birthday !

  2. Kevin October 7, 2014 at 11:18 am

    Good article bro those are facts of life and Happy B-DAY

  3. Matt October 7, 2014 at 11:50 am

    Happy bday bro!

  4. ASF October 7, 2014 at 1:05 pm

    Now this is some next level real talk. Summarizes a lot of what I’ve been thinking about.

    Look at the great men of history and how they lived.

  5. Pete October 7, 2014 at 4:27 pm

    Thanks for the honesty.

    I’m 23 and have around 16 notches. But I’ve met a girl who fits with me so well. Smart and sexy too. A little weird but I can deal with that.

    I also feel like I can let my guard down a little with her as well. The negative of the game/manosphere is in some ways you know how promiscuous women can really be so it becomes hard to trust them.

    I’ve been with her 16 months, we’ve hopped a couple countries together. She’s been with me through some shit too.

    Do I feel like I’m ready for Level 2? Yeah I think so. I’ve been out to bars and seen the women looking at me with their hungry eyes. Would I trade out my current one for any of them? Fuck no.

    But I’ve made peace that it could all fall apart in the future, but I’m glad I made the decision to step into the ring.

  6. boss October 7, 2014 at 9:50 pm

    happy birthday vk, still the best blog in the game

  7. Virgle Kent October 8, 2014 at 9:38 am

    Mr Johnson,

    “Tunnel vision is a trap..” Is the correct thought. You’re right most people today consider the past with a utopian vision and rarely put it into full context.

    Kevin, Matt, ASF, Boss

    Thanks for the compliments


    Notches aren’t going anywhere trust me on that. And if you’ve been with her for 16 months I’d already say you’re in level two shit right now. I think being at peace that it could all fall apart in the future allows you to enjoy and savor the good times as they happen and not take them for granted because bad times will come.

    “The negative of the game/manosphere is in some ways you know how promiscuous women can really be so it becomes hard to trust them.” This is the blessing and the curse because once you know the true nature of women it’s hard not to look at everything and rethink it all. I have good post coming up on this. Thanks for the comment.

  8. Ron October 8, 2014 at 10:42 am

    I needed to read this. I can’t help but feel the manosphere is becoming toxic place lately for preaching the exact opposite of what you’ve described here. It’s 100% absolute never ever get married, all western girls are ruined, always pump and dump girls unless she’s a virgin housewife, etc, etc no exceptions, zero room for subtlety. If you in any way appear to have views that aren’t 100% with the party-line, you are branded a beta, a loser. It’s the manosphere’s version of thoughtcrime.

    There’s an addiction aspect to the doom and gloom, in the same way that radical feminist sites post everything as patriarchy. I think it’s inherent to human nature if you aren’t satisfied with life, to be more susceptible to an us vs them- basically hijacks guys that would be oriented towards improving their lives and focuses energy on the evil “them” that are keeping us down. The government, the feminists, the minorities. The current state of Heartiste with the constant race/HBD baiting is a classic example of how what used to be a place for men’s self improvement has become a toxic place that just serves to get men angry at the world. It’s good to see the world for reality, but you go too far and you forget the original point of living a better life.

    Thanks VK you are a true soldier for putting this up. Happy Birthday.

    • mr johnson October 8, 2014 at 11:18 am

      f you in any way appear to have views that aren’t 100% with the party-line, you are branded a beta, a loser. It’s the manosphere’s version of thoughtcrime. < i understand what youre saying here and have seen it go down many times. i like forums that allow a free exchange of ideas where people act like adults. it is possible to entertain another persons perspective without agreeing with them or feeling threatened. i allow people to have their views. ive seen many men make a comment that presents a slightly different perspective than 'all women are evil hos'. and without fail someone calls him a mangina and then all their buddies jump in on the attack. its virtual chest thumping and it takes away from the original premise. i guess there's no control over the dynamic in the comments section. mr kent seems to maintain the maturity and objective mindset that other writers and commenters are lacking.

  9. luis October 8, 2014 at 12:20 pm

    Bookmarked. This was exactly what I needed. Many thanks.

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